EMDR for Complex Trauma
You feel like you are “too much” and worry that you can’t trust your feelings because they constantly conflict with each other.
You crave connection and are desperate for space. You know you are safe with your partner, but a part of you sometimes tenses up when they touch you- especially after you’ve had a stressful day.
What if you had a better understanding of where these emotional responses came from and learned to navigate daily challenges with more ease and self trust?
I help individuals with complex family and relationship histories create space for their emotions without shame or judgement and repair their relationship with themselves so that they remember they are enough without jeopardizing their relationships with others or losing their sense of self along the way.
You’ve been in therapy for years and maybe have learned some skills or have a better awareness of your experience, but you keep having the same fight with yourself or your partner. You still wake up with familiar feelings of dread or anxiety or find that your emotions keep getting the best of you.
Why is EMDR therapy with me different?
EMDR allows us to take all that work you’ve done with past therapists or information you’ve read in this month’s self help book and apply it to past memories where you didn’t have access to that information. We work to show your younger parts that you have the skills and resources to navigate those past challenges differently. We can’t change the past, but we can shift your relationship to what happened so that you only hold on to the pieces that help you move forward. This allows your body to finally let go of that feeling of urgency or dread that can pop up and take over.
In my approach to EMDR, we put a bit more emphasis on the body, which allows us to get a fuller picture of your experience as well as integrate your new coping skills and perspectives on a deeper level. Rather than just processing in a cognitive space where we often get stuck on intellectualizing experiences, embodied EMDR invited us to check in with physical sensations as well. Your body goes with you everywhere and holds important information about your past and present experience. It is our best tool for healing and growth and must be a part of the therapeutic process.
Change can be scary.
Especially when you’ve lived your whole life feeling this way. It’s familiar. It’s predictable. Anything different has too many unknowns and it is easy to avoid or put off making any kind of change. I hear you. You are not alone. In EMDR, we work with all of those parts. The ones that want change and the ones that would rather avoid anything unfamiliar in order to keep you safe from potential danger. We have to listen to all of these parts in therapy as they are the ones who set the pace (not just the therapist). Sometimes we have to slow down and re-route to make sure each part of you is on board and ready to move forward. And yes, then we make space for the parts that feel the urgent need for change and want to wave the magical wand that “fixes” everything. Each of these parts are welcome here. All you have to do is open the door of possibility and take the first step.